ÑHILDREN’S SLEEP PROBLEMS/BUILDING THE BASICS: SLEEP ASSOCIATION
The conditions present while going to sleep are called “sleep associations” They are the things, events, people, and anything else that might surround induce sleep.
We all tend to look forward to, and even depend on, the same, or a a similar set of sleep conditions being there for us each time we want l asleep. These are different and personal for each of us. They usually ir things like a dark room, a favorite side of the bed, or that special pillow.
Sleep associations help us get to sleep. Routines and rituals ã important part of most people’s lives—but nowhere are they more common, and more important, than when they center around sleep. They seem to help bridge the gap between day and night, wakeful activity and the unknowns of sleep. Even as adults—logical, rational, and usually wanting more sleep—we go through certain steps to be sure everything is “right” for sleep.
I can’t go to sleep without reading for a while.
I set a glass of water on the nightstand, plump up my pillow, check the alarm twice, and then relax.
Children learn to go to sleep in the conditions that their parents set up.
They learn to expect that old blanket, the night light, the music box, or their special pillow.
Kevin was always rocked to sleep. We made sure that he was fast asleep when we laid him down; otherwise he would cry. If he woke up later, he would cry until we rocked him again.
Since adults are generally in charge of their own lives, they are, theoretically, also in charge of their own sleeping conditions. Imagine what would happen if they were not. Suppose that the parent noted above, when awakened by a windstorm, was all out of water—or, worse yet, discovered someone had hidden her alarm clock. How could she possibly get back to sleep worrying that she might not wake up on time?
Children often find themselves in such frustrating situations. They wake during the night to find that the conditions they went to sleep with somehow changed during the night.
Remember that arousals are a normal part of sleep cycles—a time when we check to be sure everything is as it should be before we fall back to sleep. How lonely a child who has fallen asleep at the breast must feel to discover that it is no longer nearby! The bed must certainly feel less comfortable than Daddy’s arms or the rocking chair. Certainly calling out or crying is a logical, understandable, reaction—an attempt to regain the conditions favorable to sleep.
Difficulty falling asleep and frequent waking are common sleep problems. They may be connected. When a child cannot get to sleep, he will also not be able to get back to sleep. His sleep associations can be the root of it all. Even if you do not suspect this to be your child’s problem, it is important to look at it. Developing independent sleep associations is also a preventive measure.
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